"... yep, and I've found that when I lift weights in the morning, I see better results."

"I mean, look how conditioned my nose is; It's a butt-sniffing machine!"

"...and these pectoral muscles... I am a sexy bitch!"

"My ass is to die for. Tight like a virgin chihuahua. I'm too sexy for my fur."

"Then, you have to nap because rest is a key factor in sexy bitchness."

"But, we just woke up... and we're not supposed to sleep where the human's sit. You're going to get into trouble."

"What? Dude, they're gone for the day. What they don't know won't hurt them. Come on up, but try to shake off your excess hair because your black ass will give us away for sure on this couch."

A few hours later

"Hey. HEY! Wake up."

"It's sleepy time, man. What's a dog gotta do to get some sleep around here?"

"Sorry, but I'm bored. Let's go do something."

... give a dog a bone ... (yawn) "Hmm. Ok. What to do now?"

"I got it! We'll move over here and lay down."

"You sure are a lazy, blond hair shedding son of a ....."

"NO! I have the plan, my friend. Follow me."

"Where? In there? It's kinda dark..."

"You figured out what we're doing yet?"

"Um, I'm a dog. I do not possess the necessary brain capacity to do much more than eat, sleep, chase, drink, hump, poop and 'sit' for the humans that say I'm a good boy after I do it. Besides, reading minds is an impossible task. I'm scared to ask, but what-o-what are you thinking, blondie?"

"Fishing for the goldfish, dog!"

"I rock at fishing! Just get my head down in there and .... Hey, I found one with no eyes. It's a fsh, get it?

"uh oh ... um friend, I'm kinda stuck.Can you give me a paw with this?"

"You're such an ass, blondie!"